Flaming June's Love

Am I the only one that looks at photos and totally investigates backgrounds? I check out what is ont he floor behind the subjects, clocks, tabletops, shoes, feet, are the shirts buttoned? What is on their dressers? Are there dishes in their sinks in that picture? Also have you ever wondered what its like to live in someone elses house.? Well here is a quick look at my house at bedtime. only thing missing is JAcks LOUD VOICE!!!!

I had a lovely day with the girls and Timmy yesterday taking Missi to college. Really I was reminded of the good things about my ex husband. He is a safe driver, I never worry about an accident. He remembers everything I do. The kids, vacations, people and old friends. That is cool since Andy hasnt been around for all that stuff. So I must admit I was feeling a bit more nostalgic last night than is comfortable. It wasn't until tonight when Allie brought up one of the conversations we had in the car that I suddenly felt catapulted back to the days of being married to that man. In the car he asked Allie in some way whether she asks Kendall everyday "a thousand times a day" whether or not he loves her? I used to do this. He "explained" to her how when someone asks for love and attention you feel pressured to give it to them so then .... YOU DONT WANT TO. He told her that if you marry or are with someone that loves you more than you love them it can be quite ...

You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. Kahlil Gibran Today was one of those days. I am writing it now so that someday we can all look back and realize that THIS DAY- was ONE of THOSE DAYS. I gave today. I gave alot today- and it was all given freely with LOVE in my heart. I Left my beauty somewhere else today. If she were to come home right now, she will have been changed for the experience of having us drive away. And I am, happy. I am crying tears of change and self doubt, but they are more tears of pride and relief. I am so proud of my Missi for being so determined to DO THIS. I doubted her for her quest to "DO ART". I worried that her drawing and creativity was going to distract her from the real works of life. Math, science, english. She did those tasks but her joy has always been ART. HER OWN ART. I am inspired by her ART, her CREATION. More than that I am so proud that her professors saw great thin...

hold on to me.. Hold to me sweet child Hold to momma's skirt. stay under my shelter dont leave my guard Im too scared to open the gate. As I see your dreams behind your eyes You want to reach to further skies, "you belong to me, along my side, You cant go I will decide." I cant decide, I must subside, Let her fly, let her fly. Be gentle world, To my sweet girl, My sweet girl, my sweet girl. Give her vision of her place in life, Give her courage to survive her strife, Give her patience to achieve her goals, Give me courage to let her go to let her go to let her go

Stole the virginity thing for my friend T. I thought it was funny. Our beloved cat Pippa returned home. I am happy for that. The two cats that she left behind are not happy she is home. They are pissing everywhere in a urine fueled standoff. "get rid of the hussy cat that left us or we piss on the laundry AGAIN!" I am contemplating opening the doors "BY ACCIDENT" and letting the F'ing pissers out. Just sayin' If I were so inclined. Why did I ever agree tot he cat thing anyway. I hate cats. They suck. And piss. Did I tell you Jack is signed up and all set to attend Pre-K? Yup its official he will be starting sept 7th. 7:50 in the am. at 7:51 I will be sitting in my care either crying tears of Joy and Liberation... Or tears of.... Joy and Liberation!!! I am slightly looking forward to going into the bathroom without the reminiscent "HEY MAAAA are you doing a POOOOOOP or a PEEEEEE!?" MAAAAA! Or my all time favorite.. Me "JAck watcha doing?...

Andy and I are lying here on the bed talking about getting to sleep. We moved our bedroom around in the spring and if you havent been here this is what we did. Since we have an atrium in the bedroom we have a five large window end to the room. Very victorian in design, very very light filled in the am. The tops of our heads are facing almost perfectly East. If I open my eyes at the right time int he am I can see the sun rise. (If I roll over and look out the window which is eyelevel.) That said, we now have been sleeping with the windows open every night, which is heavenly for me. Adoring the night sounds, crickets, birds of every sound, cats having rages in the neighbors yard. We have very few cars at night since the end of our road is the END OF THE ROAD. I have not put curtains on these windows because NOTHING WORKS FOR ME. So we are left with a few thoughts tonight. 1. Drivers on the Crossvalley if they so desire can look into our windows and see us. (If they have vision th...

I posted a few songs that are important to me concerning my Missi girl. To show you how quick the time has gone since my Missi came into this world. The song Tears in heaven came out the week she was born. I remember she was sick when she was born and was transported to CMC from East Stroudsburg for the nearest NICU. I had to remain in PMC since I was spiking a temp following the c section. I only saw her for a moment and touched her little hand through the incubator glass. Tim followed behind the ambulance, and my Dad met her in Scranton. My Mom remained at our home with Allie who was barely two. I remember calling the nicu and asking the nurses how she was. "She is a fighter and should be off the ventilator before too long." "She is itty bitty but a tough little thing" She stayed there for a 8 days and then we brought her home. She weighed 5 pounds that day. As much as a sack of sugar. I think of that when I buy sugar to this day. I remember being in the ...

Corinthians 13:12 Now we see things imperfectly as in a cloudy mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely. I have so many memories, I believe them memories anyway, from this date fie years ago. Even if they are just imaginations of a drug induced coma and/or mind farts of desperation, I need to go with it. I recall a "knowing". I recall a waking period of time when the ways of the world and reasons for things happening seemed so clear. I had the idea that "Oh that makes sense." "Hmm why didnt I think of that." The visions or experience I had of people that had died visiting me, seemed so real. I recall a sensation of SMELLING my Pop. BEING at the cottage. FEELING safe, LOVED, cared for. It wasn't until I was close to waking that I recall pain (physical pain) worry, and fear. Of course doubters can say drugs...

I remember about ten years ago telling someone that I felt like I was in a minefield and everyone else I knew was stepping on mines, besides me. My friends father had died, someone had breast cancer, siblings were in serious car accidents, babies born with defects. These things never affected me or my family. But always felting pending doom, or a "knowing" that my time would come to grieve, panic, cry. It was during that time in my life that I made things harder for myself. I asked for drama, looked for it actually. I was "bored" and needed to "feel" something. So I tiptoed through places I shouldn't have been, and did a few things that I am not proud of. That said. I am who I am because of these experiences. I took a quiet predictable life and ground as a pepper grinder and turned it into "something else". I never anticipated life making MY LIFE the experience it has been since those days. I was a semi spoiled, overly confident, infant....

Andy's 25 year reunion. Labor Day weekend. His reunion is a family event picnic, but few of his buddies are bringing their families so I am OFF THE HOOK! I wouldnt mind going with him but it is labor day weekend and we all know where I will be. My nephew will be home on a short leave so I will be out the mountain and at Bens Birthday party. Now I met with my pal Joann last night and she was remarking a bit about her reunion not too long ago. She mentioned something about a few of the guests "MATING" following the event. Yeah well my husband is going and there will be no mating going on thank you very much. I am confident he doesn't want to MATE with anyone else. My concern is as usual women that love to mate with other womens MATES. So to all the women out there that think Andy is so handsome and sweet and considerate. He is all those things. But guess what... You dont want him. Unless you want an orange vibe driving through the middle of your living room. Love to...

I really like people watching- any people, anywhere. I like a cold nose under a warm blanket. I need a blanket even if its hot out. I cant sleep naked- through the night, I am naked periodically through the night. My clothes begin on/or off, then at some point get off or on. I wake typically the opposite of what I went to bed as. (Ask my husband how this happens.) My lips are hugely kissable, been told by several people. The smell of Jacks neck while he sleeps. Missi's hair as it is int he morning all long and wavy and thick, Defined as BEDHEAD BEAUTIFUL Allie when she comes into a room after not seeing her for a while. She changes things, just about everything with her spirit. Since moving our bed into the circle of windows, it sounds and feels as if we sleep outside. I love my husbands big hands, His tenacity, his big heart for the people he loves, and especially how much he loves our boy. I dont love it now but will someday love how jack gets into our bed EVERYmorning. I do...

Andy, Jack and I went to the beach. We left 7ish on Sunday morning and were ont he beach by 11. It was a beautiful day and the boy hasnt been in a few years and it was a cheap treat for all of us. We drove, chatted, listened to Jacks movies playing on the mini dvd player in the back. I reminisced about trips of years before with the girls and Tim. Interestingly enough Andy doesnt mind the Timmy stories. Driving on the 4th of July to the beach with our two children and two of my cousins for a week at the beach. Bumper to bumper 8 hr drive. argggh. Anywho, we went directly to the beach and jack loved the sand. He dug rivers and holes and filled with water then watched it drain. He was the most beautiful child there. I must admit though I didnt realize the extent of his speech difficulties until several children and adults looked at him like he was speaking another language. One occasion especially a mother said "what" "What did he say?" about four times. I und...

Something you should know about When I Look To The Sky Lyrics Title: Train - When I Look To The Sky lyrics Artist: Train Lyrics Visitors: 14817 visitors have hited When I Look To The Sky Lyrics since June 03, 2010. Play When I Look To The Sky Listen to Train songs for free! toolbar.inbox.com When I Look To The Sky Lyrics All Train Lyrics from largest lyric site on the net! best-song-lyrics.com Ads by ClickFuse Send "When I Look To The Sky" Ringtone to Mobile [Verse 1] When it rains it pours and opens doors And floods the floors we thought would always keep us safe and dry And in the midst of sailing ships we sink our lips into the ones we love That have to say goodbye [Chorus:] And as I float along this ocean I can feel you like a notion that won't seem to let me go Cause when I look to the sky something tells me you're here with me And you make everything alright And when I feel like I'm lost something tells me you're here with me And I can always find my way...