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Showing posts from December 19, 2006

Counting, counting, counting....

Blessings are all around me. Healthy beautiful children. I adore them and all they bring to my life. I am rich with people that love me. I have friends that think of me on a daily basis and want only the best for me. I have a husband that I cant put into words the impact he has had on my life. I still get an excited butterfly in my belly when he least expects it. His eyes are golden brown, sparkling deep rich bronze. They see through me and into me. I cried last night, cried hard and long. He held me, rubbed my back and kissed my neck. Whispered in my ear he loves me and will always love me. I curled into his arms and pulled my knees up and he wrapped himself around me. The most lifechanging thing ever said to me I believe are his words of "You are my life" I puzzled and he repeated. My life is with you and about you and what we are together. I want to be with him, He makes me laugh hard. Love hard and I trust him. I can close my eyes and smell him when he ...

Lonely isnt a four letter word.

I have been looking at lyrics, poems, prayers, something to help put into words the loss that I feel. When I say lonely isnt a four letter word I mean there are worse things than lonely. Bitter, resentful, angry, I am lonely for the person that truly understands me. My Father truly did. I have had some really really bad times in my life, he knew them. Tucked them away and never brought them out unless I was going in the wrong direction. An honest friend that knew the truth and still had my best future in mind. I was lying in bed tonight and thought how can never be defined. How can I never hang with him again, never hear his voice, never see him with my children? I am hurting tonight, this morning and will be for a long time.