Flaming June's Love

Andy and I are lying here on the bed talking about getting to sleep. We moved our bedroom around in the spring and if you havent been here this is what we did. Since we have an atrium in the bedroom we have a five large window end to the room. Very victorian in design, very very light filled in the am. The tops of our heads are facing almost perfectly East. If I open my eyes at the right time int he am I can see the sun rise. (If I roll over and look out the window which is eyelevel.) That said, we now have been sleeping with the windows open every night, which is heavenly for me. Adoring the night sounds, crickets, birds of every sound, cats having rages in the neighbors yard. We have very few cars at night since the end of our road is the END OF THE ROAD. I have not put curtains on these windows because NOTHING WORKS FOR ME. So we are left with a few thoughts tonight. 1. Drivers on the Crossvalley if they so desire can look into our windows and see us. (If they have vision th...

I posted a few songs that are important to me concerning my Missi girl. To show you how quick the time has gone since my Missi came into this world. The song Tears in heaven came out the week she was born. I remember she was sick when she was born and was transported to CMC from East Stroudsburg for the nearest NICU. I had to remain in PMC since I was spiking a temp following the c section. I only saw her for a moment and touched her little hand through the incubator glass. Tim followed behind the ambulance, and my Dad met her in Scranton. My Mom remained at our home with Allie who was barely two. I remember calling the nicu and asking the nurses how she was. "She is a fighter and should be off the ventilator before too long." "She is itty bitty but a tough little thing" She stayed there for a 8 days and then we brought her home. She weighed 5 pounds that day. As much as a sack of sugar. I think of that when I buy sugar to this day. I remember being in the ...

Corinthians 13:12 Now we see things imperfectly as in a cloudy mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely. I have so many memories, I believe them memories anyway, from this date fie years ago. Even if they are just imaginations of a drug induced coma and/or mind farts of desperation, I need to go with it. I recall a "knowing". I recall a waking period of time when the ways of the world and reasons for things happening seemed so clear. I had the idea that "Oh that makes sense." "Hmm why didnt I think of that." The visions or experience I had of people that had died visiting me, seemed so real. I recall a sensation of SMELLING my Pop. BEING at the cottage. FEELING safe, LOVED, cared for. It wasn't until I was close to waking that I recall pain (physical pain) worry, and fear. Of course doubters can say drugs...

I remember about ten years ago telling someone that I felt like I was in a minefield and everyone else I knew was stepping on mines, besides me. My friends father had died, someone had breast cancer, siblings were in serious car accidents, babies born with defects. These things never affected me or my family. But always felting pending doom, or a "knowing" that my time would come to grieve, panic, cry. It was during that time in my life that I made things harder for myself. I asked for drama, looked for it actually. I was "bored" and needed to "feel" something. So I tiptoed through places I shouldn't have been, and did a few things that I am not proud of. That said. I am who I am because of these experiences. I took a quiet predictable life and ground as a pepper grinder and turned it into "something else". I never anticipated life making MY LIFE the experience it has been since those days. I was a semi spoiled, overly confident, infant....

Andy's 25 year reunion. Labor Day weekend. His reunion is a family event picnic, but few of his buddies are bringing their families so I am OFF THE HOOK! I wouldnt mind going with him but it is labor day weekend and we all know where I will be. My nephew will be home on a short leave so I will be out the mountain and at Bens Birthday party. Now I met with my pal Joann last night and she was remarking a bit about her reunion not too long ago. She mentioned something about a few of the guests "MATING" following the event. Yeah well my husband is going and there will be no mating going on thank you very much. I am confident he doesn't want to MATE with anyone else. My concern is as usual women that love to mate with other womens MATES. So to all the women out there that think Andy is so handsome and sweet and considerate. He is all those things. But guess what... You dont want him. Unless you want an orange vibe driving through the middle of your living room. Love to...

I really like people watching- any people, anywhere. I like a cold nose under a warm blanket. I need a blanket even if its hot out. I cant sleep naked- through the night, I am naked periodically through the night. My clothes begin on/or off, then at some point get off or on. I wake typically the opposite of what I went to bed as. (Ask my husband how this happens.) My lips are hugely kissable, been told by several people. The smell of Jacks neck while he sleeps. Missi's hair as it is int he morning all long and wavy and thick, Defined as BEDHEAD BEAUTIFUL Allie when she comes into a room after not seeing her for a while. She changes things, just about everything with her spirit. Since moving our bed into the circle of windows, it sounds and feels as if we sleep outside. I love my husbands big hands, His tenacity, his big heart for the people he loves, and especially how much he loves our boy. I dont love it now but will someday love how jack gets into our bed EVERYmorning. I do...