Flaming June's Love

Can you still see my claw marks in the mud!!!!!  HAHAHAH

I have been reading alot.  Since my break from school is now coming to an end, my reading kick must too.  I ate up 8 books in three weeks.  They certainly weren't War and Peace... but they were literary works instead of reality TV, so I'm ahead of the ball. Went to the Lehigh gorge yesterday with the boys.  A much needed day of burning off energy for Jack.  He had a rough week last week after his long Christmas break.  It seemed everyday got worse than the last.  Until Friday when all hell broke loose and he cried at school because.. "He blew it, all his hard work was wasted!" How did it get like this? well, I know.  For once, in a long time I think I know for sure what happened. We have always tried to be the "positive" approach parents. When you have a great day, when you get a good grade on that spelling test, when  you play nice with your friends....We will do/see/go/get whatever. Last week for some reason, after a yellow light on Tu...

Went to find the "cup" for the nightly cup of tea.  Grabbed a lime green with orange polka dots on it.  Its from a set I acquired somewhere along the line.  It's one that doesnt get much stage time, but when she shines, shes is a good choice. While cleaning up the Christmas stuff today I collected all the "junk" that seems to fill the corners of my house.  You know stuff that gets dropped on the counter when people come home, and then I throw into a big bowl in the cupboards.  Well I collected all that stuff and poured it into a huge Christmas gift bag.  All kindsof things.. Sunglasses, race cars, jewelry, birthday cards, marbles, and multiple chapsticks. Chapstick... I put it on my lips tonight and BAMMM... I'm back. The smell of chapstick, and the vision of the small black tube my Dad carried in his pocket... all the time. As soon as it went on I was taken back to the times sitting ON HIS FEET on the Living Room floor on myrtle ave.  We had a co...

11:08pm January 31, 2012. Almost 2013. It has been a good year.  I'm ok with it.  I'm feeling pretty satisfied with myself and our lives right now. My daughters are good.  My son is growing stronger and smarter everyday. Andy and I have had a few of our hardest days this year, but also some of our best days this year.  His surgery was tough, my catheterization, a test... that we both passed physically and emotionally. Allie graduating, passing her boards, working her big girl job. Missi turning 21, gon got school, working her job as a good checker girl. Jack sticking with it hard work in first grade.  Leaps and bounds. Me... starting  a new job, and loving it.  Letting go of some old friends that disappointed me.  Then reaching out a bit further to embrace new friends.  I am sad for the times I didn't move, speak, smile, chat, give more, encourage more, open up. I am grateful for the times I believed, forgave, hugged too long, kiss...

 Our Beautiful tree right after Santa arrived.  I sat in my rocking chair, and as I do every year, cried a few tears.  Gratitude, sadness, relief, anticipation.  it was a great tree this year, not a single problem.  She didnt fall down once, which NEVER HAPPENS.  Allie lives with her boyfriend Ryan.  I have to adjust to that idea.  So being thats the case I had to adjust to her NOT being here Christmas morning.  A very very difficult pill to swallow.  But I did it.  I imagined this day, and I did alright.  I imagine having a fever, helped me cope since I was slightly disoriented... but we had a sweet Missi, Jack, Andy, Mommy Christmas morning.  Here is the boy wonder so HAPPY to get his new Nabi.  A tablet made for kids loaded with games and learning and books.  He was psyched, as you can see.  Missi a kind and genrous sister playing the surprised onlooker when she was the one that helped Santa download...

Psalm 34:18   The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. The unspeakable happened last Friday in a small town in Connecticut.  Looking at twenty children through a guns site is.... too much.  Everyone has their own thoughts and visions of what may have happened that day in those classrooms, I wont even write them down.  I scare myself. I make myself cry, weep really. Jack's unsinkable belief that everyone is good, his willingness to help people, his unability to retreat. A gunman in his classroom.  Taking aim at he and his classmates? Someone elses beautiful child, irreplaceable gift is gone. I went to Joann's graduation on Sunday.  Her loss and grief after losing her beloved Bob, moved her somewhere else, beyond what she thought she could do.  Broken and "too old" she walked across the stage to receive her Masters Degree.  I sniled at her from  75 yards away, she saw me, we waved, I blew...

I was walking through Boscovs and saw the most beautiful Christmas tree.  It was all purply blue greenish.  Lights were blue, and covered in feathers almost like a peacock, green and just beautiful colors. Then I got closer and it was covered in Peacock feathers. A few sparkly blue and green balls and fluffy things. But not a single Christmas thing.  No Santa anything, nothing Jesus like, not one homemade looking thing on it.  So what makes your Christmas tree the most beautiful tree in town? My tree is truly beautiful.  It is covered in babies first, second, third, fourth fifth Christmas ornaments.  For THREE CHILDREN. Ornaments my Mom and Dad gave us for many years, signed by them(my mom..) like the one above from 2004. Many ornaments from Betty, Tims Mom, who took care of me every year with the sweetest little things. Boy do I miss her. Ornaments from MaryEllen.  Some from old students, patients, our first home, A US Marine, A few from my...