Flaming June's Love

Jack watching the lifeguard do pushups. It was so funny Jack then got on the sand and was "doing" pushups also. Images of his future. I love him too tooo much sometimes. My two boys. How can I stand to look at these two and not love every bit of the both. My Missi deep in thought during one of our conversations. I found out alot of my girl and I love her more all the time. Jack and Andy during the fireworks. Jack is soo tired int his pic but hanging for dear life. We are still here at the beach and enjoying the trip. Today they gave tornado warnings for the shore points so we didnt go to the fireworks on the boardwalk for they were cancelled. We do have the opportunity to enjoy individuals fireworks fromour balcony and our window. The boy is not too sure about them though. He looks and then closes his eyes and wraps himself around Daddy. I have a photo below of that. Missi is enjoying herself and we are spending some quality time together. We spent yesterday toge...

This is one thing we needed desperately. We are in Ocean City MD, At the moment I am sitting on the bed and looking out at the beach. Missi and Andy are Go cart racing and Jack is sleeping soundly. We spent the afternoon on the beach and relaxed after a long ride down here. We had a ncie dinner on the patio of the hotel with the band playing really nice. I am feeling so much better than Ihad been. I am living one day at a time and just feeling what today is going to be,. I am am enclosing pics from the day.

Lucky Me. The grad Jack and the beer keg The morning after. I will write more later.

I need a kick in the ass and then feel free to hit me really hard in the arm. I am a selfish and self absorbed sloth. I have spent the past two weeks whining about my "lack of control" and feelings of lacklustre, when truly all my complaints are within my own realm of repairedness. Babble with nonsensical words, but true. I need to relish and enjoy my kids new worlds and be grateful they have these opportunities. I was bitching about my kid in Europe, That is truly WHACKED!!!! I am sad because my daughter is growing up and doesnt want to tell me everything. NORMAL! I clicked my way to a blog today of a woman who just lost one of her two sons at birth. Twins and one died a few weeks later. I have the audacity to complain because Jack is a running, messy ball of snot and dirt. He is also the first to hug me in the morning, he wakes with LIFE in his eyes eager to go and find. He says MAMA and knows it is me. A first since his ear surgery. My husband although at t...

Allie in one of the many museums she got to tour. Obviously in stonehenge. I have only seen it in pics and there is MY BABY IN FRONT OF IT> Her date one night in an English pub. Johnny Depp? See Mr Flumpy peeking out of her backpack she has about 50 pics of HIM all over Europe. Really funny spots buses, phonebooths, stonehenge, palaces, gardens, other stuffed animals "he" met along the way. One of her 400 scenery pics I wish I could share them all with you. Allie and her Daddy, my ex. They normally bicker and disagree she said she finally got an idea of who her Dad is, I am very happy for that.

I appreciate people calling and writing concerning my latest "funk". I guess I should have known it was coming. As everyone knows I finally was off the Paxil since maybe three weeks ago. I had been taking ten MG every other or third day to keep the effects at bay. Little did I know that the worst was yet to come. I dont talk too much about my emotional stuff because I feel "winey". I have nothing to be sad about. But I was feeling really really sad, I know sad is a simple word. better description would be moody, depressed, sad about all the changes right now. They are all out of my control, and all directly effect me. I am a control kinda gal you know. I control where and when people go and do anything or did anyway. Now I have a two year old that does and goes whilly nilly. My oldest daughter in Europe with and where I didnt know. Best (sarc) of all is that in a few short weeks I will get phone calls every day or four letting me know the status of h...