Who was that masked mistake???
I watched a movie and have obviously stayed up later than usual. I watched Evening with Claire Danes and a whole bunch of amazing actors.
It was an intersting flick about a dying womans last days and the memories that come back to her, along with some of the "visitors" that come to hre in her last days.
I rememebr the nurse telling me that my dad had "visitors" on the Saturday night before he died. I asked what that meant she reassured me that he had loved ones come to see him in the night and he chatted with them and watched them walk about his room and he was more "awake" than she had seen him. It was a long night of visitors she told me. I think that was her way of saying it was time to let him go.
He was gone after that night. He was no longer fighting. Almost peaceful.
I still get that scared, panic feeling fleeting over me that he is gone and worse of all that he suffered. I just had it now, shit.
Anyway the movie. The long and short of it is that you dont make mistakes. You just live. I can name some "living" I did.
Harry
John
Jimmy
At least I am having a little chuckle now. Do I regret things, I dont know anymore. I might say I regret hurting people in my past. I dont regret where my life has landed. Every decision and choice I have made in my life has brought me to where I am today. One different choice WHENEVER would have changed the outcome of today, soooo I am happy I have lived.
The other message of the movie was that something that seemed so important at one time, just isnt when you look back. If I had all the energy I spent on worrying about people places and things I cant recall now, I imagine I would go on forever.
I have loved hard throughout my entire life. I have fallen hard and landed harder. I dont regeret that at all. I am full of passion for people, (just not the same KIND of passion I couldnt get enough of 10 years ago.!) I enjoy their company, stories, and experience. That is who I am and all is well.
It was an intersting flick about a dying womans last days and the memories that come back to her, along with some of the "visitors" that come to hre in her last days.
I rememebr the nurse telling me that my dad had "visitors" on the Saturday night before he died. I asked what that meant she reassured me that he had loved ones come to see him in the night and he chatted with them and watched them walk about his room and he was more "awake" than she had seen him. It was a long night of visitors she told me. I think that was her way of saying it was time to let him go.
He was gone after that night. He was no longer fighting. Almost peaceful.
I still get that scared, panic feeling fleeting over me that he is gone and worse of all that he suffered. I just had it now, shit.
Anyway the movie. The long and short of it is that you dont make mistakes. You just live. I can name some "living" I did.
Harry
John
Jimmy
At least I am having a little chuckle now. Do I regret things, I dont know anymore. I might say I regret hurting people in my past. I dont regret where my life has landed. Every decision and choice I have made in my life has brought me to where I am today. One different choice WHENEVER would have changed the outcome of today, soooo I am happy I have lived.
The other message of the movie was that something that seemed so important at one time, just isnt when you look back. If I had all the energy I spent on worrying about people places and things I cant recall now, I imagine I would go on forever.
I have loved hard throughout my entire life. I have fallen hard and landed harder. I dont regeret that at all. I am full of passion for people, (just not the same KIND of passion I couldnt get enough of 10 years ago.!) I enjoy their company, stories, and experience. That is who I am and all is well.
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