Flaming June's Love

I felt him today, so close to what holds me to this place. I was thinking about where we were two years ago. I was thinking about what hes physically missed. I just felt a sudden tug at my mortality and my place in this world and how close the other side is. I had Allie in the car and I just started to cry. I was crying about how proud he must be of her. She is working her job, going to school at night and along with that being a great kid. I want him to see that. I was thinking about how Missi gets more and more beautiful everyday and how he waited for her to come home from school everyday, then made her toast and milk. I was thinking that he would be so proud of me, yes I am saying it. I have been doing alright lately. Pushing forward and trying my best to be a good mom and wife and sister and daughter. All that stuff and I do it so that someday I will see him again and the whole family can sit and chat for eternity. I was driving along and just felt he was alright. I felt clo...

I found this book a few weeks ago at the ole B&N. I read it sitting there. I fell in love. I found today that he died on the 25th of July. I do believe that people are gifts, this one was amazing.

"O divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love. For it is in giving that we receive; it is in pardoning that we are pardoned; and it is in dying that we are born to eternal life."

As I had expected and hoped Allies party went off well. I am attaching a few pics of the evening. One o fjust her on her night and one with her two best friends. They are good kids that have gone to different colleges but come home to one another. The blonde Kellie is just that.. a blonde kellie!!!! Overly happy but honest. smart but dumb. A good friend that doesnt know any better. Kailyn is highly intelligent and sassy, not a naive bone in her body. misread as a bitch.... no ... she is a bitch... if you dont know her. honest, and if she doesnt lilike you you will know it. Allie rounds is out by rounding them both down, Kellie not so soft and Kai not so hard. It works for them. Missi is away for the week at camp. As everyone knows camp is her highlight. she loves it every summer. It may be called bible camp but I dont see it. If she is religious she tries very hard to not appear it. She Ibelieve is very spiritual but far from religious. SHe can seem abrasive with her voici...

19 years ago today I gave birth to the best thing that ever happened to me. How do you describe a child that defines what every parent would want in their future? There have been few surprises with her. She has told me almost everything there is to know in the progression of teenage years. I have had less than ten moments of upheaval with her and truly look forward to her company more than anyone elses. She had some friends over tonight in the backyard and Iloved it. I am now getting to bed with Andy and I dont worry at all about what they are up to really. I am sure they are being typical teenagers but I trust mine. Thank you God for giving me her. Thank you for all of them. She is my reason. Not perfect, but you know what , I love that part too.

Yeah I was roaming youtube and found this song which in turn reminded me of again.. another one of my wanderings.... I met this guy at the Y. yeah the Y when Missi was a baby. He was there with his daughter and I was swimmin with her. He and I just clicked and he shared alot of his favorite music with me. This is one them. He wrote the words out for me and put them in my car. He also pressed some flowers for me and put them with it. Yeah it was real real sweet. I was taken with him and the great conversations we had. No crazy funny business just a cool guy I should have met another time. Then again.... maybe not. He wrote out the words to Eric Claptons Wonderful Tonight. He attached a note because at the time I cut my hair really really short. He thought I looked beautiful no matter what I did.