In your house.

-


This is my house tonight, about an hour ago.  Yup hes reading in the tub.
The boy sleeping on our bed.  I was reading a new book.  Missi at the casino with her BF, and a few of their friends.  Allie finally has a night off and went for mexican with her BF and a few friends.
My laundry is everywhere.
Our dog was treated for fleas.
I didn't make dinner tonight because I was out shopping all day with my Mom.
Bought myself stuff today, three weeks before Christmas, not a smart thing.
My grey roots are growing in, and I dont want to do a damn thing about it.
My eyebrows are far too wild.
I am too critical of myself, but realize, no one has it all together.
I need to change the cat box and the guinea pig cage.
Jacks room needs a total overhaul but I dont know what to do with it.
Christmas is around the corner, but I have hardly purchased anything.
Tim and the girls and jack are getting the tree next week.  So I had better get the stuff out.
My car is so full of shit, there isnt room for "the boy" some days.
I dream about coffee, I have a secret grown up non threatening crush on the principal at jacks school.
He has great clothes.
His wife must dress him everyday.
My Mom started to whistle today in the car, when we weren't talking, I laughed out loud at her, then she laughed.  It was the funniest thing we've done in a long time.
Sara is a breath of fresh air, a wide open car window in the middle of winter.. breath of fresh air....
Just in the nick of time, when I thought it was ok that my friends were either dead, lived far away, or were all nutty-she came along out of truly no where.
Jacks school had a fundraising night at the B&N tonight.  We went.  He was good, and played with some friends.
It was good.  I people watched and kid watched, and laughed to myself about the characters in the world.
"It takes all kinds to make the world go round."
Well YES IT DOES.
My boss gave me a gift card, for being an asset to the students, showing character, professionalism and role model/ mentor.
BAHAHJAHAJLALHADJHALALLALAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHHAHA
I'm as crazy as a bedbug! 
If he knew what I was thinking half the time I'd be out on the corner shaking my pencil can, or selling apples.
So now we sit here on the bed.  The only thing organized in here is that we sleep in a made bed every night. Why?  I like a made bed.  It just feels.... like a new sleep, not a left over sleep from the night before.
OK, my whacky slip is showing, better get to snoozeville.
btw, If you are reading this, you are not quite center either, so its ALL GOOD.
This is what we look like right now.  His left foot, my left foot, his book, my computer, the afghan, the comforters. 
A day will come when I will wish we were here again.  I know that.  I'm going to LOVE this moment a moment longer.  I'm appreciating HIM right now. 
OK Its over, he just called my cell phone to watch me get up and walk across the room.
Ugghh.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Kiss

-
Image
  It has been 75 days. When I went to bed at night I would cry, every night.  My Mom would begin the process of "bedtime" at least 30 minutes before I actually had to go to my room.  She would give me the countdown. "Next commercial break"  "Ten more minutes"  "Go get your last drink of water" Some nights she would begin to doze and I would squeeze another 10 minutes until the dreaded bed time. Then began the process.  We would go to my room, which was only 12 feet from the living room in all actuality, but it was miles in my little girl heart.  Mom would pull down the covers, tuck me in, give me all of my comfort things and then I would cry.  The more she tried to make me comfortable with the thought of sleeping, alone, the harder I would cry.  If she would just say go to bed, it would have been easier. We would say my prayers together, Our Father, Hail Mary and then all of the God Bless's. The God Blesses were my definite way to get her to ...
Read more

Ayla

-
Image
 When I was in High School my best friend was Amy.  I don't remember how we met or where, but somehow we just clicked.  I believe it was probably on the patio where in the 1980's you could go outside and smoke cigarettes with your friends on free mods or breaks.  Yep those were the days.   We were in 10th grade which made us 15.  I smoked Parliament light 100's  with the recessed filters (IYKYK) and she smoked Benson and Hedges.  She was a cheerleader that was so far from the "cheerleader" type it would crack us up.  We wrote notes in those days, scraps of paper that we would purge our daily trials onto, fold in some triangular football shape and pass to one another in the hall.  We could fill a note throughout the day and then I would throw it into a box for the ages to find someday.  We were able to talk endlessly about music, people, boyfriends, animals, school, college, parents, divorce, siblings, hours of chat.  We al...
Read more

No, not that.

-
Image
 Lets talk about graduation parties!  Should I order the chicken scampi or marsala for the chicken dish?  Cakes and cupcakes or cookies?  DJ or photo booth or both? So we decorate the cake with Wyoming Seminary as a graduate or Penn State as his college destination? No, we wont talk about that.  You know, the "drophimoffandleavehimtherepart" or the "Ihaveabsolutelynopurposewithouthiminmydailygrind" lets not forget "Whenyoufoughttoliveforthisboyandnowheisgoingwhylive?" OK OK I'm not going to end my life because Jack is leaving for college, but for christs sake what the fuck is my purpose now?  I am struggling, struggling with so many things right now. I know my struggle on paper is nothing compared to so many other people.  My weight, my hair, my boy, my heart, my future.  I want to just get to the point where I can just take him and drop him off.  Rush through this summer and get it over with, pull off the bandaid quick and start the new chap...
Read more