Smile and look up.

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I was supposed to go to Philadelphia tomorrow for a follow-up appointment with the cardiologist.  They cancelled me until Tues the 13th.  Which is fine with me since we are having Jacks swim party from 6 to 8. 
Dads anniversary being tomorrow, should it be a solemn day?  I don't know.
I certainly cannot forget the day.  Nor the events that changed all our lives on this date.
But Jack is an amazing SEVEN YEARS OLD.
Every ounce of our boy is vibrating with LIFE!!!
Every fiber of his being is beating and strumming with magic.
He is a blurred symphony of fast moving, dust scattering carnival lights.
Our boy is the unplanned saving GRACE of our lives, whether we know it or not.
What did we do before Jack.
I dreamed of Jack.
I remember a vivid dream I had back in 2002.  I was semi awake looking for a baby in my room.  The baby was a little boy with blonde hair and blue eyes who was sleeping in the laundry basket.  As clear as life itself he was a part of me.
So where does this lead us to this date and this event.?
Our lives.. all of our lives have revolved around THEM.
Whether it was my grandparents living and working for my parents or my parents living and working for us.
It has always been about THEM.
So as my Dad would have wanted it, we continue on, and do the best that WE CAN for THEM.
Hopefully when I am gone, they will have some amazing event on a date that reminds them of me, so I can be a part of it.
If only in their hearts..
Becasue that is where I want to be anyway, forever in THEIR hearts.
As is Pop.
Forever in our hearts, and a whisper away, a smile on the boys face.
An extra lap around the pool, that skip in Jacks step, or wiggle of a dance.
His Pop will be on the wind and the twinkle in the bluest eyes of a proud seven year old as he blows out the candles on his SOCCER Birthday cake.

To everything there is a season,
a time for every purpose under the sun.
A time to be born and a time to die;
a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
a time to kill and a time to heal ...
a time to weep and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn and a time to dance ...
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to lose and a time to seek;
a time to rend and a time to sew;
a time to keep silent and a time to speak;
a time to love and a time to hate;
a time for war and a time for peace.
ecclesiastes 3:1-8


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