My friend Suzituzi

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My sister in law found my blog.
My sister in law that has known me the longest.
The one that KNOWS ME>
We began as friends in maybe 1981? Before she started dating my brother.
We laughed alot and shared alot of dreams together.
Time has been good, bad, ugly and kind to both of us.
I know my brother has broken her heart. I would fix it if I could. I want to say everything will be alright. It wont. I have been where she is, how we got there are different but I was divorced from someone I loved. I wanted to stay with my first husband. Badly. She wants to stay with my brother, no matter how ugly the situation is getting I believe she wants to try with him. Time changes people and I think my Fathers death changed my brother. He was an example of husband and father in our eyes. I remember thinking how they had it all together. I guess as much as we know is as much we dont know.
Either way, fair warning, if you read any farther, or go back there might be stuff you dont like. Whoever you may be. This began as a place to purge my pain and loss after my Dads death. It turned into a place for my thoughts to rest so I could sleep.
Suzituzi is my friend. Strange, but an open mic where I can say whats on my mind, in my heart, where I have been and where I want to go without being judged-openly. I cant go back and alter my feelings from the over 500 posts. I am what I am. I have made serious mistakes, and hurt people I love. I have also made some real friends and encouraged some great kids. Either way Suzituzi is an alright gal.
I imagine Suzituzi as being a logbook out in space where all these posts are just floating about waitng to be tapped into on the www. My children will have this site for posterity and their children can read about the Nana that was cool but at times selfish.
Most of all I want the world wide web to know that there was never a woman that loved her family as much as Suzituzi.
One more thing before I go, I want my readers, family or not to know that I have always tried to be honest. At least here as I write I have told things as I know them. I love you all.
I may not like you all the time!!!! but I truly do love you.

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