pick a lane you ass....

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OK so do you remember riding your bike? If you havent done it in a while I tell you it is not, I REPEAT the same as when you were twelve. This event happened about a week ago but just had the thought pop back on into town, (You know my brain...) OK so I am riding along the dike,? dyke? (spelling wrong, political fopah IM sure, sorry...) anyway along the river with my boy on the back and the path is maybe ten feet wide. Yeah thats wide... well put a three year old on the back that cant sit still and points and yells at every bird and remarks about all the aiwwpwaayyyyssss (c'mon thats airplane..) He is a wiggling jostling turbo back there and I cant see him except a shadow occasionally depending on the direction we are riding. So I am not a confident bicyclist, maybe 4 on the scale of one to ten. Fine with just Jack and I, but.... damn put someone else up there coming the other way and I turn into a wobbling feet dragging wining ooohhhnooo person. OKL to get to the point the other day I see this not jocky, yet not dorky normal guy kinda cute (no helmet) coming the other way. So now I have 30 seconds to pull my shit together and not look like a total ass not scare myself and drag my friggin feet to screech us to a toe skinning toenail grinding halt.
1. I cant look at the guy because I lose track of the path and will definately fall off.
2. I cant think too hard cuz Ill panic and end up stopping totally in the path.
3. I am trying to talk to Jack as cooly and calmly as possible so he doesnt freak out and scream GOOOOOOO Momma GGOOOOOOOOO.GAGOOO GAGOOOO.
4. Just keep moving he will pass and all will be well just pedal real straight and keep the handles straight and....

ONE SIDE OR THE OTHER , ONE SIDE OR THE OTHER.
that bastard is talking to me while I am trying to look cool, shut the F up.
It hits me., I am in the middle of the path.
OHHHNOOO>


Needless to say. You all know how this amazingly romantic rondezvous with my destined bike man lover turns out right..

I did it, yes I now have two ingrown toenails on my feet that bang in my shoes all friggin day long and I havent ridden my bike since. And the guy well I dont know what happened to him really I was so busy pedaling away in horror that he could still be at the bottom of the graded bike path since HE CHOSE THAT LANE ASSWIPE>
.
Jack by the way has not mentioned the bike either. hmmmm I wonder if this is one of those memories he will not remember. (PLEASE..)

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