Its the tater...

-


My husband calls me tater, you know like a potato. Long story but unknowingly someone heard him call me that and they took it as an insult. They believed he was calling me fat. Trust me he would never do that. I could be fatter than fat and he would nt say the words.
I spent the day wrapping gifts at a friends place. My Mom watched Jack and the girls were at school. I spent the day in the back office of their shop and listened to their office run for the day. I liked it. People coming in and out and chatting all day, friendly kind of business. I wouldnt like the "snobby" people that come in but I am typically friendly and chatty my kind of work.
Any way I spent 4 hours wrapping gifts and still am not done. I have finished Andys stuff, and most of allies, Missi's are all different shapes and sizes so more difficult to get wrapped. jacks things are toys, big trucks, police cars, hummers, puzzles, blocks, leapfrog, wooden trains, tracks, books, I have alot to do. I am going to get the cheating gift bags tomorrow so as to get it done.
My friend Maryellen is not doing well. Her hands and feet are curling up and I am thinking she is going into some kindof failure since she cant hold a cup or anything. I hope she makes it through the holidays. She insists on all of us going to her house christmas eve for dinner but she cant walk so I dont know how we will be able to do that. I will help as much as I can.
Allies Boyfriends mother invited us to her house christmas ever for drinks, I would love to go cuz I really like her, but I dont think we will make it this year. Maybe.
I am trying to find a poem or song lyric that explains the way I am feeling but nothing seems to touch on it. I am doing my best and people know that the first holidays are the most difficult. I have to do the best I can for the kids.
My beautiful husband and gorgeous kids and the first pic of me that I have put on here yet. Thats me the unusually large, robust, voluptuous one.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Kiss

-
Image
  It has been 75 days. When I went to bed at night I would cry, every night.  My Mom would begin the process of "bedtime" at least 30 minutes before I actually had to go to my room.  She would give me the countdown. "Next commercial break"  "Ten more minutes"  "Go get your last drink of water" Some nights she would begin to doze and I would squeeze another 10 minutes until the dreaded bed time. Then began the process.  We would go to my room, which was only 12 feet from the living room in all actuality, but it was miles in my little girl heart.  Mom would pull down the covers, tuck me in, give me all of my comfort things and then I would cry.  The more she tried to make me comfortable with the thought of sleeping, alone, the harder I would cry.  If she would just say go to bed, it would have been easier. We would say my prayers together, Our Father, Hail Mary and then all of the God Bless's. The God Blesses were my definite way to get her to ...
Read more

Ayla

-
Image
 When I was in High School my best friend was Amy.  I don't remember how we met or where, but somehow we just clicked.  I believe it was probably on the patio where in the 1980's you could go outside and smoke cigarettes with your friends on free mods or breaks.  Yep those were the days.   We were in 10th grade which made us 15.  I smoked Parliament light 100's  with the recessed filters (IYKYK) and she smoked Benson and Hedges.  She was a cheerleader that was so far from the "cheerleader" type it would crack us up.  We wrote notes in those days, scraps of paper that we would purge our daily trials onto, fold in some triangular football shape and pass to one another in the hall.  We could fill a note throughout the day and then I would throw it into a box for the ages to find someday.  We were able to talk endlessly about music, people, boyfriends, animals, school, college, parents, divorce, siblings, hours of chat.  We al...
Read more

No, not that.

-
Image
 Lets talk about graduation parties!  Should I order the chicken scampi or marsala for the chicken dish?  Cakes and cupcakes or cookies?  DJ or photo booth or both? So we decorate the cake with Wyoming Seminary as a graduate or Penn State as his college destination? No, we wont talk about that.  You know, the "drophimoffandleavehimtherepart" or the "Ihaveabsolutelynopurposewithouthiminmydailygrind" lets not forget "Whenyoufoughttoliveforthisboyandnowheisgoingwhylive?" OK OK I'm not going to end my life because Jack is leaving for college, but for christs sake what the fuck is my purpose now?  I am struggling, struggling with so many things right now. I know my struggle on paper is nothing compared to so many other people.  My weight, my hair, my boy, my heart, my future.  I want to just get to the point where I can just take him and drop him off.  Rush through this summer and get it over with, pull off the bandaid quick and start the new chap...
Read more