sushi, the beast, and birthdays....
Its been a few days since I posted, not that I m terribly busy but I do have things going on in my life. Today is Melissa's 15th birthday. I remember today as a cold dark morning tha I had to be at the hospital early for a shceduled C-section. Tim and I arrived and everything went beautifully. Until first the OB announced as he was delivering her head "W'eve got a boys face...Looks pretty boyish Tim..... Its a girl!!!!" He said OUT LOUD!!! AH SHIT!! I should have divorced him that day right there and then. I was sorta out of it and didnt hear the baby cry at first. waiting waiting waiting..... Tim was at my head and his tone changed to everything is going to be ok, its gonna be ok really. Turns out she aspirated upon delivery and was in respiratory distress. Our little pumpkin was blue and not moving. They rushed her out and intubated her quickly and flew her to CMC in Scranton. Iwas at Pocono where I was working at the time. My Mom was at our house in Stroudsburg, and Dad was in WB waiting for any news. Turns out he was the first to see her for any amount of time and held her hand first and then rocked her that next morning first. They had a special bond since. Missi is a quiet kind hearteed girl. When Pop died she didnt want to got o the funeral, I wasnt going to make her until all the other cousins were telling her they couldnt do it without her and she went. I am glad she did. I saw my daughters for the fist time look like real sisters. They held one another and cried together and said beautiful things to eachother that I dont envy them having to say to each other. In a nutshell that they will never be far from eachother and never feel alone. I dont have sisters so that bond is something I do envy.
Any way my Missi girl requested Japanese Hibachi for dinner so we went with Allie, Joe (the neighbor) nana, me and missis two friends. sushi was on the menu. Missi is a girl beyond her years isntructing evryone of the proper way to eat sushi, what all the different things were and how to use chopsticks. She researched to event so we would all be ready. It was a smash. I had about 4 shots of saki, if you catch the shrimp in your mouth the chef squirts some saki down the hatch afterwards. It was all good. Missi got a skateboard for her birthday and her trip to the convention a fe weeks ago. plenty condisering my 15th was probably jeans and asweater on a good year. (no complaints)
The play was great over the weekend. Thekids were wonderful and those of you hwho are parents understand that although my gilrs had bit parts I swear everylight on the stage was focused on them. I cant help it. I adore them. Jack was so into the whole production. He stood on Andy's lap then mine and bounced around tot he music and the dancing he thought was "yeahhhhhhh" yeahhhhhhhh" I saw a Mom I havent seensince the parochial school Alliewent to a long time ago. She was looking at Jack and Me and ANdy. I cant help but chuckle to myself and think I am such a novelty tot hese people. Ne husband, baby, name, no anulment, good god, WHO"S YOUR BABIES DADDY! hhhrrmph, in their burberry scarves, and D&G purses. Well Ive had two official husbands, and more lovers than purses so screw you!
My one girlfriend said that these people are jsut jealous cause they dont give themselves a second chance, I have given myself numerous second chances. sometimes daily! start over today, try harder, forgive myself is a big one. I have made some massive errors in life, and some I dont know if I will ever forget. But I do understand that I made choices that I thought were right at the time. No one fucks up on purpose. No one makes a choice and says "This choice is going to ruin my life,do they?" Anyway we all had a great time at the play.
Andy will be 40 this year and I am planning a paty for him. He has taken on my life and my girls and my family Jack and is happy everyday. He is so in love with this child we have tht I wonder where he was all my life. Now neither of us is perfect trust me that but I love him for the same reasons people dont like him. Outspoken, smart, witty and just a presence. He looks alot like Vincent Donofrio, 6'3" salt and pepper hair, dimples, bulky, brown eyes agreat smile. Ill post a pic of him in his VD look. OK
I am still missing my Dad, since I had a dream last night that he was on the phone and I was trying tot ell him to come home for 5 minutes, just 5 minutes. I woke up with myhusband telling me he was worried about me sitting up in bed holding my imaginitve phone to my ear and crying out loud. I told him I can get through the days but at night I pray for peace, for him, my mom family children and everyone else. Allie said he hasnt "visited" her because she believes he is busy visiting people he hasnt seen ina long time. I think he is resting. He had a terrible struggle those last fedw weeks and people said things intheir heartsinto his ear not knowing if he heard them. I think he is somewhere, resting and thinking about the things he had seen, heard, and lived throughin his life. He was loved. He is still loved. He is missed and we will never be the same without him. Love you Pop.
Any way my Missi girl requested Japanese Hibachi for dinner so we went with Allie, Joe (the neighbor) nana, me and missis two friends. sushi was on the menu. Missi is a girl beyond her years isntructing evryone of the proper way to eat sushi, what all the different things were and how to use chopsticks. She researched to event so we would all be ready. It was a smash. I had about 4 shots of saki, if you catch the shrimp in your mouth the chef squirts some saki down the hatch afterwards. It was all good. Missi got a skateboard for her birthday and her trip to the convention a fe weeks ago. plenty condisering my 15th was probably jeans and asweater on a good year. (no complaints)
The play was great over the weekend. Thekids were wonderful and those of you hwho are parents understand that although my gilrs had bit parts I swear everylight on the stage was focused on them. I cant help it. I adore them. Jack was so into the whole production. He stood on Andy's lap then mine and bounced around tot he music and the dancing he thought was "yeahhhhhhh" yeahhhhhhhh" I saw a Mom I havent seensince the parochial school Alliewent to a long time ago. She was looking at Jack and Me and ANdy. I cant help but chuckle to myself and think I am such a novelty tot hese people. Ne husband, baby, name, no anulment, good god, WHO"S YOUR BABIES DADDY! hhhrrmph, in their burberry scarves, and D&G purses. Well Ive had two official husbands, and more lovers than purses so screw you!
My one girlfriend said that these people are jsut jealous cause they dont give themselves a second chance, I have given myself numerous second chances. sometimes daily! start over today, try harder, forgive myself is a big one. I have made some massive errors in life, and some I dont know if I will ever forget. But I do understand that I made choices that I thought were right at the time. No one fucks up on purpose. No one makes a choice and says "This choice is going to ruin my life,do they?" Anyway we all had a great time at the play.
Andy will be 40 this year and I am planning a paty for him. He has taken on my life and my girls and my family Jack and is happy everyday. He is so in love with this child we have tht I wonder where he was all my life. Now neither of us is perfect trust me that but I love him for the same reasons people dont like him. Outspoken, smart, witty and just a presence. He looks alot like Vincent Donofrio, 6'3" salt and pepper hair, dimples, bulky, brown eyes agreat smile. Ill post a pic of him in his VD look. OK
I am still missing my Dad, since I had a dream last night that he was on the phone and I was trying tot ell him to come home for 5 minutes, just 5 minutes. I woke up with myhusband telling me he was worried about me sitting up in bed holding my imaginitve phone to my ear and crying out loud. I told him I can get through the days but at night I pray for peace, for him, my mom family children and everyone else. Allie said he hasnt "visited" her because she believes he is busy visiting people he hasnt seen ina long time. I think he is resting. He had a terrible struggle those last fedw weeks and people said things intheir heartsinto his ear not knowing if he heard them. I think he is somewhere, resting and thinking about the things he had seen, heard, and lived throughin his life. He was loved. He is still loved. He is missed and we will never be the same without him. Love you Pop.
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