Flaming June's Love

Im not feeling optimistic lately. I should be at a very good positive point in my life. I am not feeling it. I have great kids. My oldest in now in England and called sounding like a little girl. I wanted to reach through the phone and get her home. She is fine I know but the mother in me doesnt want to let go. I am counting the days til she gets back only to start counting down to her departure to college. Missi is good turning into a sassy independent woman. She is different from Al. Missi doesnt talk as much as Al. She is a normal teen and keeps her stuff to herself. Jack is good and very very active. I am truly physicallly exhausted by the end of the day and my body hurts. I have nothing to complain about but I am doing it anyway. A girl at work yesterday said she hated me because she thought I had the "perfect" life. hmmm... Most of the time I feel really lucky and grateful. Other times I want to either run away and be alone, Go back to the life before ...

the back of the house allie and her man squash spaghetti missi and her dance partner

Absolutely gorgeous. I hope to age as beautifully as she has. And did I mention........... My hormones are out of control ---sorry for all the reference to unattainable men. LOL

Do I have to say anything.

Did I ever tell you all we have a dog? This is Honey. She is the most awesome puppy dog in the whole world. Mom and I have been working on Allies Graduation party details. We arent in a position to have a party in a restaurant or hall, nor do we want that stuffy feel to it. So it is a backyard party. Invites went out and it looks like about100 people could show up through out the day. I love having parties, especially with family that I like. I have a huge family and they are all coming. Andys family coming also. Her friends form school coming. Missi s friends coming. Our friends coming. It better not rain that is all I have to say. Two tents ten tables 100 chairs. meatballs pasta sasuage and peppers pasta salad potato salad baked beans wimpies (sloppy joe) 6 foot sub coleslaw relish tray veggie tray regular chips dip pretzel stuff. half of Miller lite half of birch beer cooler of water 6 wines (cheap stuff) I attached the pic because I like it. She looks "tough...

LOOK AT THESE LASHES, THEY ARE DEFINATELY HIS DADDYS. MY MISSI GIRL THROUGH THE SCREEN DOOR. SHE IS SO PRETTY BUT HAS NO CLUE. Andy and I were chatting last night about the way the house is going. It truly is amazing. We have come a long long way together. I think I love him more today than yesterday.

Missi 4 Allie 6. Allie 7 Missi 5 Allie 10 Missi 8 Andy and I went to the appliance store today. We spent alot of money more money than I think I ever spent on stuff. It is good though well worth it I think. We got Fridge, stove, dishwasher, microwave, exhaust, washer and dryer. Under 4000 bucks. The house is really getting real. I am going to pour myself into it cuz I will definately lose my shit when Allie goes to school. I feel it in my bones. My Missi went on her date tonight with Jared. I saw him and thought he looked too old for her but I guess I think that cuz she should be my baby. He is about 6' blonde crop hair popped collar and loafers. Young republican, little Andy. Hubby is going to show me how to scan pics and I hope to attach a few of my girls young.